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AwkwardPromisedLand : 24X36" Watercolor on Clayboard PanelA Tuesday night, almost Wednesday and what an awkward day of the week but it fits me right now. I began the week and a painting with an awkward color, royal purple stuffed into the bottom left side of the painting like a big messy challenge.How to make the awkward graceful? And it does happen. After struggling with it for the past few nights it's now what it was meant to be. Just like the man/beast that I am, intrinsically clumsy and ill fitted and yet graceful when I am loved. And I remember those dreams where I would go to school and had forgotten to get dressed first and everyone would stop dead in their tracks to point and laugh at the naked clown. But god how nice it was when someone would be so thoughtful as to light the candles in their room and take me in to their warmth, to smile and laugh at my lame jokes, to pretend that my fumbling fingers and the dry mouth of someone slightly scared to death gave pleasure. And it's good to be strange when the strangeness is no longer a stranger in someone else's eyes. To be known to fall fast asleep before the candles have burned down and rattle the early morning walls with less then the soft breeze of easy breathing.And I wondered why I was made so beautifully awkward. But then if I thought I deserved to be loved, would I have known this gratitude?
AwkwardPromisedLand
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